Tuesday, August 30, 2005

Friendship, Love, and Over-Communication of the Feelings Therin...

I have seen a lot of posts on love, friendship and the feelings each of these promote lately. I figured, I'd drop my own brand of harsh-worded critique to the mix.

Many go on in leaps and bounds about the happy-happy joy-joy feelings of friendship and love. Many will spew forth a stream of delightful, flowery sonnets and verses about true friends, soul mates, the perfect companion, etc.

It would appear, much as in all aspects of living, I'm a little out of the loop as they say. Yes, I feel these feelings. Yes, I am absolutely delighted to have found the occasional person (friend or otherwise) who can put me truly at ease with myself and my surroundings. However, what I am most delighted by is the fact that I don't have to tell my true friends and loved ones of my appreciation or feelings.

What kind of soul connection do you have if you need to re-affirm it verbally every chance you get? What kind of comfort do you feel if the only thing you ever talk about is how good/awesome/relaxed this person makes you feel. If you can't just sit and talk with someone, or better yet, just sit with and not say anything at all, you don't understand what you say you have and what you are really missing.

I have gone on a bike ride, rollerbladed with, and sat in a car with a true friend and not said anything for over 10 minutes. This isn't an uncomfortable silence, this is joy. I don't need to say anything for my friend to know I enjoy his/her company more than most anything else. They don't need to say something about how much they like/love me or that I put them at ease. It's fucking understood.

As I find with some people, you can talk a mean game, but step on the court/field/rink and you fuckin' choke. Well don't let that happen to one of the better aspects in your life. Friends are friends through thick and thin, loud and quiet, up and down, down and out.

If Deuce and I were sitting in a jail cell covered in fake blood, with monopoly money stuck all over, neither of us would be saying "I love you. You make me feel totally at ease and like anything is possible. You are truly a great friend. Thank you." One of us would be complaining about a lack of alcohol and the other would be yelling "I told you to bring the fucking camera." Nor would we be saying that in a car, or in a boat. On a horse, or on a goat. Not in a house or on a plane. Here at work or in a train.

I do not speak what can't be said. I do not diminish the unspoken aura of the words "True Friend"